I Use Paintbrush

Song Series Part Whatever!

Stephen Shillingford — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 18:51:37 +0000

So I put on the iTunes shuffle and I get…..

Ok that song is fucking awesome. The title however lacks. Or at least for my purposes the title lacks. So I was all, I can’t let that be the only thing I give you my fearless reader. So whatever comes up next is what I do. Thankfully one of the easiest songs to do a drawing of comes on. The song is amazing as well. I present you with “In The Aeroplane Over The Sea” by Neutral Milk Hotel. If you haven’t listened to them go out and buy the album “In The Aeroplane Over The Sea” it is fantastic.

Those clouds? Yeah, those are the Storm Clouds of Justice. Or something.

A Dumb Item I Wish To Have

Stephen Shillingford — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 18:32:16 +0000

I like a lot of really stupid shit (clearly). My one friend used to have this:

I was crazy jealous when he first got it. And a few years later, I still really want one. Perhaps someday I shall buy it and make you jealous. It’s doubtful. But maybe…

A Feud

Stephen Shillingford — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 19:50:58 +0000

This is Rachel:

She is a pretty cool girl. We generally get along. Except she did not seem to appreciate it when I told her I stuck my balls into her car.

Rachel's Car

My Testicles

So she got all upset. It got violent.

So I called for a truce because I was tired of being kicked. But when I went for the truce high five she slapped a dirty rag into my hand. Unacceptable. Now everytime I see her car I will be putting my nutsack (pictured above) on her car (also pictured above). Sadly her phone cannot recieve my picture messages so I will just have to tell her. Daily.

So It’s Been A Little While

Stephen Shillingford — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 07:16:02 +0000

I don’t want you to get all nervous that I’ve forgotten this blog. It’s just I was talking to TC the other day and he said something that he wanted to see. It’s a flipbook. Do you know how many drawings a flipbook will take? Probably more than I have done for this site total. And I wasn’t even really sure what it would be about. Well, I think I have the idea down and I’ve started doing the drawings. This will probably take for-fucking-ever. I will try to throw in some other drawings but there will probably be a few days straight with no updates.

But you know how it is. Really good art takes time. Everyone should know this. At least, my flipbook takes a long time. Kicking around the ideas is a pain in the balls. Up until this very moment there were about 20 ideas in my head. People getting killed, sky diving-shit like that. Well it’s down to just one. It wasn’t easy. To me, the story has to be compelling. Humorous. Yearning to be told over and over and over again. Once more maybe. Up to maybe five times. Really five times should be the minium you watch the flipbook. Break your fucking computer watching it. For real. Why not? It’s not like you need it. Lovely people like do what I do. Like waste time facebooking. And coming here.

P.S. Don’t stop coming here.

Feelings: As In, How I Feel Right Now

Stephen Shillingford — Thu, 19 Mar 2009 14:52:24 +0000

Click Click Click Click

Stephen Shillingford — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 19:03:41 +0000

I have made a second music video! This time the song actually has some length to it. The song is “Click Click Click Click” by Bishop Allen. Please enjoy.

The 17th of March Is St. Patricks Day

Stephen Shillingford — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 05:45:17 +0000

If you go out you are bound to see this

It will be on just about every person at the bar. Now let’s think about some shit. It is a tuesday. These people have jobs or school. They don’t usually drink at the bar on tuesday. How do I know this? Because I drink at the bar on tuesday and I’ve never seen any of you fuckers there. But you are going to be drinking more than usual. Maybe having some of this and calling it a night.

Right exactly…what’s that? Oh you’re going to get

Wow, two bottles of wine. Okay well then now you are all done for the night, what? Seriously?

And some beer. Okay. Well then you need one more thing to have a good St. Patricks Day.

That my friends is a bucket. And if you think that after only having a few drinks with some friends every other friday you can down some vodka, a couple bottles of wine and some beers you are going to need that. You see most of you will be vomitting this St Patricks Day, and since there are more people than toilets in most bars just bring a bucket. You’ll be good to boot and rally.

From me here at this website have yourself a nice St. Patricks Day and then stay the fuck out of my bars.

The Time I Pooped In My Mom

Stephen Shillingford — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 04:25:21 +0000

Yeah you just fucking read that. The reason for this post requires some backstory. Ok, so for six days I wrote a blog called The Life And Times Of Tyler Dodge. The address is thelifeoftylerdodge.wordpress.com. I just looked at it tonight and I realized how much I miss writing insane shit. I mean, drawing is great. Lots of fun. But writing somewhat long posts about ridiculous shit is something I do miss. I actually regret pigeonholing myself into a Paintbrush website. Perhaps I will break my rules and have some posts that are just words. I don’t know. Anyway, in the post I wrote about Tyler’s birth I mention that I had been to one other birth, and that story is for another blog. That blog is this one.

So this, is my mom:

She does not actually look retarded. She is a lovely woman who puts up with all of my shit. Even the shit that I put inside her.

So I was a late birth. As in I did not want to come out. I think my mom was pregnant for something like 34 months with me. The doctors were concerned. I guess they knew who was in there and wanted to meet greatness before they died. But I did not want to come out. I had just resigned my lease and got new carpeting put in. I was not moving.

I used the word cooter so I could write that sentence and not cry. Anyway. Then something happened that I had not thought about. I needed to poop. Bad. But where to go? I had never had this feeling before. It’s like moving into an apartment that has no toilet, but you don’t care because you’ve never had to piss or shit before. Then one day, all you need to do is shit. Clearly you are getting out of your lease and into an apartment that has a crapper. But I did what anyone else would do, and that’s I just shit. Well, the doctors said that isn’t healthy.

So they pumped my mom full of drugs and I fell out. Then the doctor picked me up, I don’t remember but I probably shit on him. Then he handed me to my dad. I did not shit on my dad. This is because my dad had a mustache, and I respect that.

Props dad. Big time.

This Is Reaching New Levels

Stephen Shillingford — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 02:59:13 +0000

So I thought I would end up doing a bunch of stories through Paintbrush ala the AC story. But not all stories are worth telling. So what do I do? I make a music video. This is my first ever attempt that this sort of thing, so here we go.

Pat Gill, You Drank Too Much

Stephen Shillingford — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 19:59:34 +0000